It all started with the onion seeds that I bought at Home Depot with the sole intention of sowing them to reap a hearty crop in a time frame of sixty days. I did as instructed and waited for what ended up being the most anxious time in my life. Mere ten days later I had the stubs peeping up and I planted them with lots of hope. Alas! my dream was not to be realized that easy. A fortnight later they were all gone!!
Some uprooted by the nasty squirrel others just gave up for various reasons and that one massacre encrypted a depressing image in my brain and my soul was taunted. I used this experience as an analogy for my forthcoming motherhood. I wondered if I could not raise a plant then how on earth was I going to raise a child?
The thought kept me up for nights. Days obviously were busier than they should have had been. One thought led to another and the chain turned into a vicious circle of questions with hardly any answers. To solve my restlessness I decided to resort to fellow mothers who are also good friends. The unanimous reply was,"Enjoy life now. Once the baby comes your life will be practically over!" This response was not what I had entirely expected. I did know that motherhood was indeed a full time job but what I did not know was that it was more of torture than bliss.
From time immemorial I have always loved kids. I became a mother figure fourteen years ago when I held my half an hour old nephew in my arms and lightly kissed his forehead. It was from day one that I adored him, sang lullabies, read stories, fed, bathed, and cleaned him. My sister till this date tells me that I have more rights over him than she as a biological mother does.
To be honest I enjoyed every single moment of it and if I were given an opportunity to do it once more then I would gladly do it all over again. Which was true with my second nephew who was born seven years ago. Although my career kept me busy in his time I made sure to bond with him at every opportunity I got. Probably that is the reason that I weep every time at their birthday because the thought that my babies are turning into grown men is emotionally overwhelming for me.
No matter what their age for me they will always be my little ones the way they were the day they were born. Considering all this I am pretty confident that I who feed, clean, and play with my nephews and other random children would surely enjoy being mother to a child that I have had always so desperately wanted. Long time ago I came across a saying that read, "Its human to be a woman but divine to be a mother." I am a true believer of this one single statement.
Motherhood brings out the best in a woman. It fulills atleast for me that one side which is not very hard to explore. I always say this that if mothers ruled then the world would be a better place to live in. Come to think of it every single child with an outstanding character always has a mother behind him or her who has raised the child in a way so as it values the world and humans around it. There are exceptions but majority of the time a mother is who makes or breaks a child.
Considering that it is a privelge to be a mother I wonder why I get lousy responses such as,"Oh! Life is going to get busier with kids! Enjoy when you can! And god knows what?" I mean think of our ancestors who had their kids in less favorable circumstances but they had them and they raised them. Maybe given an option they would not have done it but having done it they did it as a part of their duty. Then why is it that women in this time and age think of having children as a burden more than a blessing?
One striking reason is of course freedom. A baby means responsibilities and not many men or women prefer that. But then why have kids to cover the perfect family picture. The point is to be happy isn't it? If one feels that a kid is a burden then they should choose not to have it. Why have kids for an eye wash and then drum about the challenges of being a mother?
In my case my husband took a lot of time to understand and estimate what fatherhood involved. Its only now that when he sees my bulging belly that he understands the gravity of the situation and responds to my requests. Be it shopping together or massaging my back. Bonding with the child now will take us a long way in future. To be very honest I wonder how single mothers deal with the enitre pregnancy drama. My experience is 85% unpleasentaries and 15% fun and not having a co-perating husband does not help emotional challenges. So through this blog I salute single mothers for their daring to do what two of us fail to face bravely.
I am no Gladiator or a saint but I know one thing for sure that the day I hold my baby in my arms will be the best day of my life and no comment or fear will ever stand between me and her. Come what may I make this solemn promise to be a good mother to her. To nurture her and to tend to all her needs. I am sure there will be days when I would want to run away for a week from all the chaos but I know that even if I did run away I would always want to come back to the tenderness of her love and affection. Every time I see her tiny feet, legs and face on the ultrasound monitor I automatically have tears of joy in my eyes.
If a child so tiny can bring tears to my eyes from inside the womb imagine what would happen when she would yawn or smile in my arms. So for now I refuse to listen to all the feedbacks I have so far recieved. So what if rearing a child involves sleepless nights and back pains I am still better than the penguin that struggles and fights bitter antartic winters to hatch its egg. I will derive strength from my daughters love and my sole purpose then on would be there for her no matter what.
After all I am a fully grown adult who consciously signed up for a role that not many women get to enjoy or experience. I take this blessing as a sign that the Almighty who gave me this baby will also give me the strength to deal with the chores that it involves and with that I hope that every mother who reads this blog knows that somewhere out there indeed is a mother who is happy to have her child and not exasperated and delusional or sorry for popping a baby out. Hopefully I too will be part of the latter and not the former group ;-)
Some uprooted by the nasty squirrel others just gave up for various reasons and that one massacre encrypted a depressing image in my brain and my soul was taunted. I used this experience as an analogy for my forthcoming motherhood. I wondered if I could not raise a plant then how on earth was I going to raise a child?
The thought kept me up for nights. Days obviously were busier than they should have had been. One thought led to another and the chain turned into a vicious circle of questions with hardly any answers. To solve my restlessness I decided to resort to fellow mothers who are also good friends. The unanimous reply was,"Enjoy life now. Once the baby comes your life will be practically over!" This response was not what I had entirely expected. I did know that motherhood was indeed a full time job but what I did not know was that it was more of torture than bliss.
From time immemorial I have always loved kids. I became a mother figure fourteen years ago when I held my half an hour old nephew in my arms and lightly kissed his forehead. It was from day one that I adored him, sang lullabies, read stories, fed, bathed, and cleaned him. My sister till this date tells me that I have more rights over him than she as a biological mother does.
To be honest I enjoyed every single moment of it and if I were given an opportunity to do it once more then I would gladly do it all over again. Which was true with my second nephew who was born seven years ago. Although my career kept me busy in his time I made sure to bond with him at every opportunity I got. Probably that is the reason that I weep every time at their birthday because the thought that my babies are turning into grown men is emotionally overwhelming for me.
No matter what their age for me they will always be my little ones the way they were the day they were born. Considering all this I am pretty confident that I who feed, clean, and play with my nephews and other random children would surely enjoy being mother to a child that I have had always so desperately wanted. Long time ago I came across a saying that read, "Its human to be a woman but divine to be a mother." I am a true believer of this one single statement.
Motherhood brings out the best in a woman. It fulills atleast for me that one side which is not very hard to explore. I always say this that if mothers ruled then the world would be a better place to live in. Come to think of it every single child with an outstanding character always has a mother behind him or her who has raised the child in a way so as it values the world and humans around it. There are exceptions but majority of the time a mother is who makes or breaks a child.
Considering that it is a privelge to be a mother I wonder why I get lousy responses such as,"Oh! Life is going to get busier with kids! Enjoy when you can! And god knows what?" I mean think of our ancestors who had their kids in less favorable circumstances but they had them and they raised them. Maybe given an option they would not have done it but having done it they did it as a part of their duty. Then why is it that women in this time and age think of having children as a burden more than a blessing?
One striking reason is of course freedom. A baby means responsibilities and not many men or women prefer that. But then why have kids to cover the perfect family picture. The point is to be happy isn't it? If one feels that a kid is a burden then they should choose not to have it. Why have kids for an eye wash and then drum about the challenges of being a mother?
In my case my husband took a lot of time to understand and estimate what fatherhood involved. Its only now that when he sees my bulging belly that he understands the gravity of the situation and responds to my requests. Be it shopping together or massaging my back. Bonding with the child now will take us a long way in future. To be very honest I wonder how single mothers deal with the enitre pregnancy drama. My experience is 85% unpleasentaries and 15% fun and not having a co-perating husband does not help emotional challenges. So through this blog I salute single mothers for their daring to do what two of us fail to face bravely.
I am no Gladiator or a saint but I know one thing for sure that the day I hold my baby in my arms will be the best day of my life and no comment or fear will ever stand between me and her. Come what may I make this solemn promise to be a good mother to her. To nurture her and to tend to all her needs. I am sure there will be days when I would want to run away for a week from all the chaos but I know that even if I did run away I would always want to come back to the tenderness of her love and affection. Every time I see her tiny feet, legs and face on the ultrasound monitor I automatically have tears of joy in my eyes.
If a child so tiny can bring tears to my eyes from inside the womb imagine what would happen when she would yawn or smile in my arms. So for now I refuse to listen to all the feedbacks I have so far recieved. So what if rearing a child involves sleepless nights and back pains I am still better than the penguin that struggles and fights bitter antartic winters to hatch its egg. I will derive strength from my daughters love and my sole purpose then on would be there for her no matter what.
After all I am a fully grown adult who consciously signed up for a role that not many women get to enjoy or experience. I take this blessing as a sign that the Almighty who gave me this baby will also give me the strength to deal with the chores that it involves and with that I hope that every mother who reads this blog knows that somewhere out there indeed is a mother who is happy to have her child and not exasperated and delusional or sorry for popping a baby out. Hopefully I too will be part of the latter and not the former group ;-)
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